Wednesday, December 31, 2008

A Book on How to Be a Comedian or What to Do When All Else Fails...! (Outline)

1. Keeping things in perspective, this is not a comedy routine, this is a real life story.
2. Fact is, everyone wants in, they want a piece of the action.
3. Reflections of the Noble On The Dubbie.
4. Saving your pennies, or, on The End Times and Death and Dying.
5. Overcoming writers block or peak experience and religious deity.
6. The wonders of massage therapy and its contribution to economic growth.
7. Jesus was a Harvard drop out, he went counter active to the point.
8. Why Rupert Murdoch decided to blow up The World Trade Center.
9. Anti-Computer Science Genius and the 1% anti-intellectual.
10. One World Trade Center and Two World Trade Center or The Man Who sold the World.
11. Intergalactic Jewish Business Men don't come easy.
12. Ma Bell ATT Verizon Optimum and Big Brother, there's one around every corner or how I learned to love simulation and the lobotomy.
13. Who can afford to be funny, I can't, aka working for a living.
14. If you thought life was just a bowl of cherries then get a load of these apples.
15. Everything is negotiable including the word of God itself.
16. Don't mix your apples and oranges, do your food shopping at Walmart, and get your drugs at Caldor.
17. Bright lights, Pizza Soda Mitch, Pizza Soda, do me Mitch, do me!
18. What it means to be a competent Doctor in your field of practice.
19. How many women does it take before Oedipus returns home?
20. Back into nature, blow your nose, and gesticulator.
21. Pussy is God, so watch your ass, we will total your Capital next time.
22. As far as nuclear wars go it was a good one.
23. Why men go to hell or what happens when you hurt a woman's pride and refuse her shame.
24. The OK Coral, the bullets are not real, or why do cowboys eat breakfast of champions.
25. Rudimentary flower power when 1940 comes into town.
26. Global Circus.
27. A Book on How to Become A Comedian or What To Do When All Else Fails.
28. In conclusion, Horses Ass is similar to a Jackass, they both need head shrinks.
29. Preliminary discourse as autobiography on life history of a man, not so funny.
The End

Friday, September 19, 2008

A Book on How to Be a Comedian or What to Do When All Else Fails...!

Sense into nonsense and then back again...all
the pizzas into pinnas and go well done before and
after, sense into nonsense and then back again so
as to see beyond disorder! To climb a mountain of
shear despration to deliver the tablets and the
elixer. To see beyond the falicey of logic and the
waste associated with ontology my dog barks in the
afternoon, I can always change back to a better
solution, how about a transfer so I can live in a
different country, have I passed the audition yet,
kinda obvious if you know what I mean............
mathematically in plane english! So as you can see
I make the most of it and take suggestion as if I
have any choice outside of getting a life for
myself in all honesty. Ok, so my computer is an
asshole and hates Nicky Pinna; explain the lie of
personality and the pretense associated with it...
a monthly announcement with an allowance, as I have
said, cash change; computer science genius, down to
all.....communist pan handlers; no more obnoxious
door slamming for the Captain, God don't owe them
one. So in all good intention I have another smoke
and it's on me, coffee please with a slice of
bacon. Feeling funny yet, ok, this is a book that
will show you how to be a Comedian, it is a book of
hope and faith as you take the journey of self
exploration and tackle the problem of how to make
this a better world for yourself and others. this is
a book with a spiritual message, this is also a
self help book to top it all off. Then I must ask
myself should I seek out help, do I need counsle,
is there anybody outside of me that can make
something of it, or should I accept simple answers?
As far as metaphysics goes this is a tricky one
and as it stands there are outside forces that come
from the occult; a story eyed tale of what happens
to my lover square it off and round it out was the
world no trouble on the Planet. bondage, sufferage,
let women vote, keep it tight with no real buisness
during the allocation, make movies with no film,
cars without tires and computer having no printers.