A Book on How to Be a Comedian or What to Do When All Else Fails...! (Outline)

1. Keeping things in perspective, this is not a comedy routine, this is a real life story.

2. Fact is, everyone wants in, they want a piece of the action.

3. Reflections of the Noble On The Dubbie.

4. Saving your pennies, or, on The End Times and Death and Dying.

5. Overcoming writers block or peak experience and religious deity.

6. The wonders of massage therapy and its contribution to economic growth.

7. Jesus was a Harvard drop out, he went counter active to the point.

8. Why Rupert Murdoch decided to blow up The World Trade Center.

9. Anti-Computer Science Genius and the 1% anti-intellectual.

10. One World Trade Center and Two World Trade Center or The Man Who sold the World.

11. Intergalactic Jewish Business Men don't come easy.

12. Ma Bell ATT Verizon Optimum and Big Brother, there's one around every corner or how I learned to love simulation and the lobotomy.

13. Who can afford to be funny, I can't, aka working for a living.

14. If you thought life was just a bowl of cherries then get a load of these apples.

15. Everything is negotiable including the word of God itself.

16. Don't mix your apples and oranges, do your food shopping at Walmart, and get your drugs at Caldor.

17. Bright lights, Pizza Soda Mitch, Pizza Soda, do me Mitch, do me!

18. What it means to be a competent Doctor in your field of practice.

19. How many women does it take before Oedipus returns home?

20. Back into nature, blow your nose, and gesticulator.

21. Pussy is God, so watch your ass, we will total your Capital next time.

22. As far as nuclear wars go it was a good one.

23. Why men go to hell or what happens when you hurt a woman's pride and refuse her shame.

24. The OK Coral, the bullets are not real, or why do cowboys eat breakfast of champions.

25. Rudimentary flower power when 1940 comes into town.

26. Global Circus.

27. A Book on How to Become A Comedian or What To Do When All Else Fails.

28. In conclusion, Horses Ass is similar to a Jackass, they both need head shrinks.

29. Preliminary discourse as autobiography on life history of a man, not so funny.

The End